gun buying review

I made a post a few years ago about buying a gun from Walmart, so to be fair I'll post my experience with Richard's sporting goods, since the topic of reviews was posted the other day.

Dicks put the little Rossi matched pair combo on sale again, so I planned on going by the mall at lunch to pick one up. Two fellas from work asked about lunch and I told them what I was going to do and it might take a while for the paperwork, but if they wanted to, we could eat at the food court. They decided to tag along (free gas)

First of all, you have to park a mile away at this mall, because the hippies of Mecklenberg county required the developer to keep some open grass areas. Whoever the genius was that decided that area should be between the stores and the parking lot should be rolled under one of the giant concrete balls they have as the county mandatory artwork. So, we get in the store and I make the journey to the opposite side just to go down the escalator. Once down, you have to backtrack to the side you originally came in from to get to the gun counter. Either Stevie Wonder laid out the design of this store or it is an engineered trap for would be gun thiefs.

I stand there for 10 minutes and see no one. Then the light bulb moment struck when I thought, "if I buy this gun now, I'll have to tote it all through the mall to get to the food court.". So to avoid a confrontation with the mall ninjas and a lock down of the entire mall, I go back up the escalator, grab the other guys and head to the food court. I finish eating and tell them I'm going back to start the paperwork. I have another brainstorm on the way to the store, that when I walk through the door and one of the greeters ask me if I need help, I'll tell them to call down and have someone to meet me at the gun counter. Well as fate would have it, this was the first time I ever been to that store that there was not a greeter at the door. :head_on_wall:

I decide to take my chances and start the trek. Once there, I was glad to see someone behind the counter, working on the paperwork for some nerdy looking, with the fashion sense of AC, customer. You would think since Pee Wee Herman had already filled out his part, it shouldn't take long before I could start mine..................... but you would be wrong. I think the guy left half the sheet blank and the counter guy had to show him several spots to complete. (Probably because Urkel couldn't stay of his smart phone long enough to pay attention.) Well, since the guy had his boyfriend with him, he had to make a joke out of every answer he checked off. :Mad:

Then we find out that the guy has a concealed carry permit and wants to bypass the call in process. The counter kid is totally lost when he realizes the guy's name is not "EXACTLY" the same on his permit as it is on his drivers license and has to call for backup. Backup is tied up in the soccer department and will be a while before he can diffuse the situation. Soooooooooo, we wait.

I tell the guy that I know what I want and I need to start the paperwork too. I was then informed that it is the company policy that only one set of paperwork could be started by one salesperson at a time, but he would call for another "associate". (That was pretty nice of the guy, since he hadn't even acknowledged my presence in the 15 minutes I stood there). Of course there are only 2 people in the whole freaking store "authorized" to do a gun sale, and the other guy is tied up. (yes, he called the same guy)

I wait probably another 10 minutes and the bosom buddies are finally finished, so I flop my drivers license on the counter and tell him which gun I'm buying. He brings out all the paperwork and explains the child lock and another useless paper to me and tells me to sign them and he'll be back. He leaves, I sign the first two useless papers, then grab the goberment form and start filling it out. I finish and he's nowhere to be found. Finally he shows back up and acts perturbed he didn't get to go through his check list of instructions to tell me about the paperwork. He grabs my license and compares it to the paperwork with the same intensity as Barney Fife dusting for finger prints.

Once I've cleared the Colombo interrogation, he says he has to make a copy of my license and he'll be back. I watch as he goes all the way across the store to an office area to make a copy. I'm no logistics expert, but a $50 copier might be of good use at the gun counter if you plan on selling a few guns a day. He returns and calls in to check my history and gets approval (which was surprisingly the simplest part)

Now comes the real top secret, homeland security, FBI investigative type stuff. He now calls into his little ear bob, shirt sleeve communication devise for a MOD (which could mean Manager on Duty, but I found out later probably stood for Minister of Defense). Jim Rockford shows up and they compare serial numbers on the gun to the paper work. They both confir and the MOD relieves the salesman of his duty on the sale.

I figured I'm finally going to get the privilege to pay for the gun........... NO, the MOD pulls out a bunch of transparent sheets and flips through till he gets to the one he's looking for. He then places the transparent sheet over the form and starts checking my answers. I know this sheet is a time saver, because it's extremely difficult to verify that everything after question one is checked "NO", with the naked eye.

Now the grading is complete, and he verifies the serial number one more time, just incase I've actually switched out the little 22 single shot for a Barrett M82, while he was standing there in front of me (I do have ninjetty skills). Now he talks into his Secret Service communication device and announces to the gate keeper that he will be transporting a firearm through the store..............jeezzz.

Once we arrive at the gate keeper (register associate), we have another confirmation ceremony of the serial number. At this point I asked them if the launch codes were confirmed and at which country the nukes would be headed. They didn't find the humor and returned to their protocol. Once the ritual was complete, I swiped my card and the Ministry of Defense grabbed up the box and headed toward the door. I tell the other fellas we're leaving and this guy is going to escort us to the car in case we get jumped by the Chinese. Again, no grasp of humor from the MOD. He hands me the box right outside the store and sent us on our way.

What's funny is, the whole time I'm watching this unfold, I'm picturing AC doing this several times a day:tooth:

 

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